Hello,
It's been a while. Not much has been happening but I still have some things to talk about. I started my new school today. It's not really a school, more like a educational program. It's like a full-size trailer in front of a middle school. My classroom is about wee big. Not many students. Okay, it's for students with personal and behavioral problems. I go there for my personal. I have no behavioral. Anyways, today was the first day. It was alright. Not much. I made some friends. Seen some fights break out. Very interesting day.
Now here is the schedule: I only have 2 classes: math and language arts. Then we have a break, then we have reading group. We have lunch. That's it, I go home early, like 11:00am. lol very simple. I'm happy about it...for now. I don't know. every school I have tried, doesn't work out for me. I don't have anymore options left, so I have to make this work. My anxiety and depression just gets the best of me and makes me not want to do things that normal teenage kids do. Like, for example: I don't get out often, It's hard for me to wake up in the morning, I don't have many friends, I don't like hanging in big groups of people. So many things are hard for me to do. Then my mom puts pressure on me to try and I just can't seem to do that. :( I definitely know I'm not the only one, but when you are stuck in a situation like this, you tend to feel that way. I sure do.My family doesn't know about my depression and anxiety. I just can't seem to trust them enough for them to show support, because I feel they wouldn't seem to understand. But when I start to lash out on them, they want to know what's the matter.
I mean, my cousin has depression, but she's not taking the steps I am toward bettering it and overcoming it.
I know I want to get better, but it is so hard.
A.P.
